Safe
by Redhood79
Summary: “After all this, what makes you think I care what you want? It’s not all about you Logan Echolls.” LoVe post-series fic. Stand alone.


Title: Broken

Rating: Pg-13

Summary: "After all this, what makes you think I care what you want? It's not all about you Logan Echolls." LoVe post-series fic. Stand alone.

Disclaimer: Don't own any of the Veronica Mars characters, Rob Thomas and UPN do. I do however own Lily Jr. and Elijah.

000

"You can drop them back at the house Sunday morning, before noon preferably," she said, not looking at him, instead pretending she needed something from her purse. He saw the bright, blond strands fall across her cheek; it took all his willpower not to brush them back behind her ear. Veronica finally looked up from her mission when she found her cell phone. Her green eyes flickered briefly on him before she turned around.

Lily and were leaning against the green convertible that Veronica had since before their engagement. Her old car had finally given up on Ms. Mars, now Mrs. Echolls, though not for much longer. Elijah, who had just turned seven, had been smiling broadly before this, dropped the grin off his face. Lily, their twelve year old had not been smiling at all. Logan had a suspicion that Lily hadn't smiled very much over the last few weeks since he had moved out. Veronica had just picked her up from her soccer practice, so she was still in her green and black uniform and knee socks. Her albino blond hair was in two pigtails. She reminded Logan of the first time he had seen her mother.

"I'll see you guys later." Veronica bent over to kiss Elijah on the cheek and he hugged her. "Call me if you need anything." Lily ducked away when her mother tried to kiss her. Instead she shrugged on her duffle bag and walked over to where her dad was standing, without looking back at her mom. Veronica just watched Lily, not showing any emotion, but Logan knew this hurt her.

"Lily, say goodbye to your mother." Lily scowled at him for a minute then turned around and hugged her mom. Veronica whispered something into her daughter's ear which Logan couldn't hear. Lily was a splitting image of Veronica, except for her brown eyes. They really were so much alike, and not just in looks. Lily was very perceptive for a twelve year old. She would spend almost all her free time outside of school and soccer at her Grandpa Keith's office. She wasn't supposed to do any work for him, being only twelve, but both Logan and Veronica knew Keith sneaked some action her way.

Veronica had stopped working for her father after she graduated with a degree in photojournalism from Neptune U, but she still helped him out now and again, which she knew drove Logan crazy.

_I don't see the big deal! I didn't get hurt!_

_Excuse me! Did you forget you're carrying our unborn child! Huh? I don't think those drug dealers would have given you a get-out-of-jail-free card 'cause of that!_

_Of course not! Drug deals **go**__to jail, honey._

She now workedfor the Neptune Times as one of their reporters. She didn't make as much as Logan did, but than prosecutors made more than most professions any day.

They had decided to meet at Logan's office instead of the large townhouse that they had bought their first year of marriage. They had lived in it together for the past fourteen and a half years, until ten weeks ago. Logan didn't want to think about that. Instead he watched his soon to be ex-wife get into her car, wave goodbye to their two children, and politely tell him that her lawyer would be sending the papers to him by the end of next week.

"Come on guys," he said getting in his car. He had been staying with Duncan and Meg in their huge beachfront property house for the first two weeks of the separation. By the third week it became clear Veronica did not want him to move back in. In fact she had even packed up more of his stuff, so he was now living in a three bedroom apartment down on Ocean Avenue, two blocks from Neptune Junior High, where he could still pick Lily up everyday if Veronica asked him to; she hardly did.

Logan carried Elijah's bag for him and plopped it down on the wood paneling floor of the entrance of his apartment. The whole way there his son had been rambling on about everything Logan had missed since the last time they had talked, which had been two days ago. "Jordon Kane said a bad word to the teacher! And I got another loose tooth! And Lily pushed Holly Swimmer down on Thursday."

"Why'd you do that?" Logan asked looking at his daughter. She just shrugged. Logan let it drop. He had been a little bit of a violent student in his day….okay a lot of bit…..okay some people had even referred to him as a psychotic jackass, but whatever. If it was a major deal Veronica would have said something; she didn't let their issues mess with the wellbeing of the kids. Wasn't that why her lawyer was sending him the papers?

_Stop thinking about that, __Logan__, you'll ruin the whole weekend._

"So, do you guys want to go to a movie?" Logan asked. Elijah, who had already flopped down on the sofa and was reaching for the remote, shrugged. Lily just went into the room she used when she came over, slamming the door.

"It's not personal," Elijah explained. "She's been like that with everybody, even Gramps!" Elijah turned back to the TV.

"Lily…" he knocked on the door before opening it. She was lying on the bed reading a Nancy Drew book.

_Cute_. She looked up briefly then turned back to her book.

"I guess we should have one of those father daughter talks, huh?"

She closed her book and flung out, "When have we ever had one of those talks, Daddy? You always make Mom do the punishment and tough stuff." Logan winced at his daughter's bitterness.

_Yep, definitely her mother's daughter._

"Well at least you're not blaming yourself for the divorce," he said for lack of any real reply. Lily balled her hands into little fists and her brown eyes burned.

"Of course I don't blame myself! I'm not an idiot!...I blame you and mom! You just don't care!" Logan could see the tears threatening to spill over. He rushed over to sit on the bed and reached out for her; she recoiled and he let his hands drop. "I do care, baby. I care more than anyth—." She cut him off before he could finish.

"Bullshit!"

"Lily, watch your language!"

"You've said worse," she shot back. "And it is…bull. You say you care…you and mommy…You_ care _about me and Elijah! You _care_ that this is ruining everybody's lives! You still _care _about each other! But you don't care enough to do something! You're just gonna let it burn out. You're not gonna even fight her on this…when you're used to fighting with her so much?"

The tears were flowing now; Lily wiped at her cheeks and eyes furiously. Logan reached out a hand to put on his daughter's shoulder. She didn't shrink back this time. In fact she jumped into his arms and hugged him tight. He rubbed her back and whispered soothing words. After a minute or two the shaking of her sobs lessened. She was speaking again but it was muffled from her face pressing into his shirt.

"What?"

"I said 'You and mom are the strongest people I know'." She looked up at him with misty eyes, smiling sadly.

"Yeah, I said the same thing about your mom," he replied, wiping a stray tear off the bridge of her nose. "You still believe it, don't you, Daddy?" Logan didn't answer her. He just kissed the top of her head and rocked her back and forth a couple of times before asking "How would you guys feel about visiting Grandpa Keith and Grandma Alicia for a few hours?"

000

This was the first Friday that Veronica had had off in a long time and what was she doing?...packing up the rest of Logan's stuff. She was not crying…she had wasted all the tears she was going to on one Logan Echolls. She was however listening to what could be considered break up music. It wasn't her fault. She had forgotten the Lisa Loeb CD was in the player…and it _was_ a good CD. And despite what _some_ people cough Wallace cough she was not being masochistic by doing this all alone when the house was empty. She just wanted to get this over with as quickly as possible. She didn't want him to use getting his things as an excuse for coming over unannounced. As much as the kids would love that, she didn't think she could take it.

Veronica had thought that the death of her best friend and its chaotic aftermath had been the hardest thing she would ever have to go through. But _noooooooo_ she then had to fall for said best friends ex.

_What are we doing?_

_No idea…_

_We need to talk about this!_

_I know!_

Then had come the trouble with keeping said relationship under wraps…which didn't last long. _And let's not forget how __Duncan__ almost killed his best friend when he found out, not to mention my dad's reaction. _

_Please tell me you're on drugs! In some kind of cult…? Lost a bet?_

Nope, nope, and possibly, was what she thought now. Oh but that drama hadn't been it. Nope, not for little Ms. Mars. She actually fell in love with the guy! In _love_! With Logan Echolls! Her once hated enemy. The Spike to her Buffy….although those two did end up having a super hot affair, just like her and Logan. _Stop this thinking, Veronica!_ She couldn't help it though. The music made it impossible to not think. Then she heard the door open. _Who the—?_

"What are you doing here?" she asked looking down at Logan from at the top of the stairs. "Where're Lily and Elijah?"

Logan couldn't help but smile at her, looking the way she did in her confused state. She looked as beautiful as she had the day they were married, since they had met really. "They're at your dad and Alicia's." He started up the first two steps. Veronica took a step back from the stairs and he stopped. She just looked at him for a minute.

"If you didn't want them this weekend you should've just said." He went up another step.

"I do want them this weekend…" He looked like he was about to say something more but stopped. "What?" she asked.

"….I …I want you too, Ronnie." Logan didn't believe anything could shock his wife anymore, after all the years they had been together and all the crap they had both witnessed. Man was he glad he had lost that bet, because that's what she was shocked. Her eyes were wide and her mouth was open, but no words came out. She took a few more steps back and contemplated going back into the bedroom and locking the door. _Except he knows where the key is, Veronica. And why the heck didn't you get him to give back his house key sooner? I mean seriously, where's your head Mars?_ Logan uses this time to come up the staircase further. They are only three stairs and about five foot steps away from each other. At one time, he knew, nothing in the world would have kept him from jumping those three steps and rushing at her to hold her in his arms.

Finally she says "After all this, what makes you think I care what you want? It's not all about you Logan Echolls." Her voice is choked, but full of anger.

"I know that." Two more steps now. "It's about you, Ronnie. It's about you and Lily and Elijah and me. All of us." Veronica notices that he is closer and her heart begins to speed up, but she can't move, can't run.

"I…it…That's right…" she finally gets out. She can't remember the last time they have spoken honestly and seriously without yelling at each other. "It's about Lily and Elijah….what's best for them." He moves and is now on the second to last step.

"You don't think they need both of us to be in their lives….together?" He hops the last step. _Damnitt!_

"Oh….so you're saying we should stay together for the kids? So they can hear us cursing each other out….Elijah's teacher will be so impressed with his new vocabulary." He tries to say something but she doesn't let him. "Or what? Just…ignore each other….Act like Celeste and Jake Kane did? Put on a good front for the neighbors? You might be able to do that, but I sure as hell won't!"

Logan walks slowly toward her, but she's standing her ground. Hell she might even punch him! "Do you remember the first time I told you I loved you?" Her jaw unclenched at this. "What the fuck?" She covers her mouth; she hadn't meant to say that out loud.

"I kind of recall you saying something like that," Logan jokes, scratching his head in mock remembrance. "I did not say that!"

_There comes a knock at her window. Who the heck could that be? It was freaking __1:00 AM__! Maybe she was dreaming?_

_"Ronnie…Veronica! Open up!" _

_"__Logan__?" She got up and opened the window. He was sitting in the tree. "What are you doing? Do you know what time it is?... If my dad sees you he is going to shoot you!"_

_"Yeah, yeah…would you let me in already?" Veronica just stood there starring at him. "Why?" she asks. "Couldn't you have called? Or waited until tomorrow?"_

_"Technically it is tomorrow, Ronnie. And the reason I didn't call is that I wanted to see you." He reaches out and kisses her softly on the lips. Veronica leans in, deepening the kiss…__Logan__ suddenly slips from the tree and has to grab onto the windowsill for support. Both of them start laughing. _

_"A little help!" She pulls him in. He brushes dust off his shirt and turns to face her. "Hi…"_

_"Hi," she laughs. "Seriously, __Logan__, you have to go. My dad's down the hall. Plus you _know_ I am not ready for…_that_ yet." She pushes him back toward the window. He stops her though by taking her hands. _

_"I know that! You know I wouldn't push you." He brushes a strand of hair behind her ear. "I love you."_

_"Sure…wait…what? What did you just say?" He looks at her like he had not just said what he said. Like he had just asked her what the whether was like. _

_"I said I would never make you do something you don't want to do—."_

_"No! The other part…"_

_"Oh…I love you." Veronica takes a step back and bumps into her bed. "You can't," she squeaks. __Logan__ compensates for the distance by taking a step toward her. "You're telling me that with all your little junior detective skills, Veronica Mars, you didn't figure it out." And then he kisses her again. This one is not like the one at the window. Not soft, but fierce, on fire. Like all the other kisses they have shared, but so much more. Veronica thinks about how she has never even kissed __Duncan__ like this. But then all thoughts begin to fade because the heat of it is getting to her. It's making her believe what he said was true. _

_She needs air so she finally breaks the kiss. They were both breathing heavy. She lays her head on his shoulder trying to catch her breath. She can't tell where her heart beat stops and his begins. He kisses her cheek and whispers in her ear. "That's all I wanted to tell you, Ronnie." She looks up at him. He's getting ready to leave but she holds on. _

_"Stay." She can't believe she's saying it either. "Just…stay…sleep by me. Keep me safe." Safe? Safe from what? You are Veronica Mars, one tough bit- Oh shut up! Let me have this moment, she chides her inner monologue. _

_Logan__ nods and still holding her, collapses onto her bed. He kicks off his shoes and lays down, she lays down next to him, front to back, his arm curled around her. "I promise to do everything in my power to keep you safe, Veronica Mars."_

"I told you about my rape that night," she remembers. He nods. "I cried…I actually cried…" She looks up at him, tears in her eyes. "And you held me…just like I did for you at the hotel that time." Logan closes the gap between them and wipes the tears away. She wants to protest, but she can't. She hasn't been this close to him in so long. This intimate. "Oh god," she whispers as he bends down to kiss her.

And it is like the kiss they shared all those years ago, brutal and full of fire. But it is so much more….it is a promise remembered…it is a promise kept…it is an apology…it is forgiveness…it is safety….but mostly it is home.

Fin

* * *

I made this as a stand alone, but am now thinking of doing another, longer LoVe piece, not to go along with this but just because these to are so shiny together! Please review! 


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